I have 10 more days to figure out series. Everything else in Calc 2 is going spendidly well right now. I think I’m still letting them scare me, but on the flip side I seriously look at them and just think “how am I supposed to figure out what this even means?” So, they’re a bit frustrating right now. I did homework problems for a while today and I got most of them correct, the problem is that I’m still guessing for the most part and have no idea how to make a connection between my guesses and what I need to know. I’m going to the park to take a break for a while…

Hopefully, these will make sense by the final.


What is studying? How do you study? More importantly, how do you know if you’re doing it right?

I think this was my problem throughout the two semesters, I was putting the amount of time I was supposed to in my classes, but what I did just wasn’t helping. And ironically, the classes I didn’t put the same amount of time into I got better grades. It was about the effort.

Do the work, read the notes, do the work, get the help, do the work again, take the instructors advice, memorize, sleep on it, do the work again. Will this get me those good grades I want and need? Will this give me some confidence?

We’ll see.

May 28, 2011

I’m halfway done with my summer semester and it will still be seen how well I’ll do. Right now I’m still feeling skeptical. I’m focusing on my schoolwork more than I ever have in my life, and I’m still wondering if it’s good enough. I wouldn’t say that I’ve never had to work for anything in my life, but I certainly never had to work this hard. I just hope in the end everything will work out.

May 19, 2011

11:38 AM

Yesterday was by far the best day of this week, and definitely the best day I’ve had since I had to accept coming back to school for the summer term. I finally gained the confidence in myself that I needed to get through these six weeks. For the first time, I don’t feel hopeless. I feel like the goal I’m working towards in actually achievable and that makes me really happy and gives me a renewed sense of hope. I hope that this continues.

May 17, 2011

11:57 AM

During my class this morning I began to think about the things that would help me in the future, all the struggles I’m going through right now, etc. Currently, I’m struggling to figure out who I’ve become in the past year. I know that I’ve changed quite a bit from the person who graduated towards the top of the class in high school. Almost daily I ask myself, was my high school too easy? Did I not challenge myself enough? What about high school is making it so hard to succeed in college? Do I want to succeed? Am I having so much trouble because my heart isn’t in it? And thus far, I still have no answers.

While I was listening to other people give their job descriptions and why they chose that specific job I think, “Wow that sounds really interesting,” or “No, that’s not for me.” It really made me realize that I’m not sure about my chosen profession and career path, but it also made me think about why I chose it and in a way prove to myself that this is what I really want. I do enjoy what I’ve found out about chemical engineering, I think that my strengths and talents will help me succeed in this field and I honestly think that it is the right decision for me.